Post by Shad on Nov 1, 2015 2:36:11 GMT
The shecat looked to the sky. The night was waning, with streaks of light and color already breaking through the sky. She blinked. Long. Slow. Drained. The night was waning, with streaks of color and light already breaking through the sky. Ravenface decided dawn would be on them soon enough and getting started now was as good a time as any. They would be gone for the better part of the day and she wanted to get going.
Ravenface made her way over to the Elder's Den. She popped her head in. Birchtail was asleep but Flickerkit had woken at some point. She was practicing breathing exercises and practicing standing.
"Don't lock your legs. You won't pass out as quickly," Ravenface reminded her absently.
The white splashed brown kit yelped in surprised, turning to look at her Medicine Cat with terror and anger in her eyes, stubbornly and fearfully backing away. Her tail curled around her body protectively and her fur spiked.
"I don't want any more plants."
"I'm not here for plants," Ravenface answered tiredly. "Well, I am -but not to give you any."
"What are you here for then?" the kit demanded suspiciously, flashing a bit of fang at her. The grey shecat was too tired to deal with this. She just loved how appreciative the kit was that she had saved her life. Truly. Her gratitude was overwhelming. Maybe, on another day, when she hadn't been woken up from her tiny, four hour nap by Ravenmist's high-pitched, miserable whimper of pain and fear, she would have had patience for the kit. That day was not today though.
"I'm just here for her," the shecat answered tiredly, flicking her tail at the whole half of the den that contained Sweetie. Flickerkit curled her lip in distaste, her ears flattening back.
"You can have her," she mewed in disgust.
Whatever.
Ravenface was too tired and heartbroken over the passed few weeks to be bothered with one kit's snooty opinion. Although it did niggle something in the back of her addled mind that Starlingfur had been telling her about.
"Sweetie has been scaring you, hasn't she?"
"Yes! She's horrible!" Flickerkit whined. God, Raven hated that noise. It made her headache worse.
"Yes, yes," Ravenface rushed, not particularly interested in the little kit's preferences. "But she got you up walking? By scaring you?"
"Yeah. She is awful! She scares me all the time and-"
"Have you been able to do it since?" the Medicine Cat prompted.
Flickerkit pulled a face. "Well.... no. -I can walk a little ways though!" the shekit added defiantly.
"Then it seems to me that she helped you so you should stop complaining," Ravenface shot back, earning her a glare. "It is a survival mechanism to increase a cat's heartbeat when scared. Yours is weak and faint. She increased it, allowing you a bit of your old life back -but I don't know what the long term affects of such a thing will be so it is best you two cut it out."
"Tell her that," the little kit growled, with entirely too much aggression when speaking to an adult, but Ravenface was not here to kit-watch. She moved passed Flickerkit towards Sweetie's hulking, slumbering form, only to be stopped by a small paw on her arm.
"Can I come back to the Medicine Den?" the shekit whined. Again. Now there were words she'd never thought she'd hear anyone say. "I'd rather be there with all those sick cats than here. I don't want to live with this monster!" Aaaaand that was exactly the wrong thing to say.
"She's not a monster," Ravenface retorted sharply, a bit of the fire sparking in her haggard gaze, making Flickerkit go quiet. "And if I hear you call her or any cat that one more time, I will personally take you out into the woods, tie a length of ivy around your tail, and tie the other end to a tree and leave you there. Forever. So you can grow old and die and never see your family again, just alone and trapped by your tail to a tree for the rest of forever until the sun makes your fur fall off and the snow makes it crack open with sores and you don't even look like a cat anymore, and I'll come back once a year just look at you and call you a monster. GOT IT?!"
Flickerkit had fallen of her paws somewhere in there and was now cowering on the den floor, amber eyes huge and terrified.
"Y-y-yes," she forced out in a squeak.
Ravenface nodded stiffly, her message successfully sent. Her head was still aching and her eyes burning from being awake for far too long. Alright. Maybe she was a little rundown. And a little crabby. Or a lot crabby. Whatever. It didn't matter. She needed Sweetie and she was wasting time here with this brat. She swatted the beast's shoulder. Cool hazel eyes snapped open to watch her with a predator's gaze immediately.
"Raiven, lass. 'Tis a pleasure." The thick foreign growl rumbled up to greet her and the tiny shecat almost -almost- shuddered. She knew that was what Sweetie wanted, to get a rise out of her, as she got a rise out of everyone, but that did not make it any less effective. Like Raven, the shecat was good at what she did.
"Get up," Ravenface mewed. "As payback for terrifying me, you're helping me collect herbs this morning. Come on then."
The savannah's eyes were sharp with anger and she flashed a fang at the Medicine Cat. What was it with everyone and fanging her today? Had the clan been taken over by vampires and someone forgot to tell her?
"Aye told yew once an' Aye'll say it again. I was naught tryin' ta scar-"
"I know," Ravenface mewed quickly, tone strained but sincere. "And I am sorry I overreacted. Is your head healed?"
The giant cat blinked in surprise, obviously few had believed her proclamation of innocence, and flicked one of her massive ears, as if testing the healing skin where Bramblenose had clawed her.
" 'Tis alright," she replied after a moment, eyes narrowed, suspicious. Ravenface nodded. Good. That was good. She did not want to waste any more herbs than she had to.
"Let me try this again. I need help -getting herbs for the clan. Will you come help me?"
Her voice was tired. Her brain was tired. Her heart was despondent. She did not have the fight in her to stir up and fuss and get Sweetie to do her will as she usually did. She hardly had any fight in her at all these days. Thankfully though, the massive cat nodded, still suspicious but willing to turn over a new leaf it seemed. Good. One less problem that she couldn't care less about on her checklist solved. They set out across the camp but the huge golden cat was uncomfortable.
"Where be the othars?" she wanted to know.
"I don't need more than one cat for gathering."
That stopped Sweetie right in her tracks. Ravenface rolled her eyes and let out a sigh of exasperation. "What now?"
"Aye ain't leavin' with yew alone."
Well that was just peachy! And made the Medicine Cat's fur bristle. "Now you look here, you mutt," she snapped, "I know my fur isn't perfect lately but I've been busy trying to save lives and if you think that you're somehow better just because your coat is-"
"It ain't that, lassie," the beast cut her off sourly.
"What then? Are you allergic to sunlight?"
"Nah. Jus' ambooshes."
The tiny shecat blinked, immediately deflating. Oh. Well. That made a lot more sense. She supposed cats did not always welcome big cats. -And were not always open about not wanting them.
"Sorry."
"Not a'tal." Sweetie shifted, as if uncomfortable with Ravenface's sympathy. She looked like it made her fur itch. The Medicine Cat could sympathize there. A twinkle of amusement did glimmer in her gaze though as she added, "Aye'll remember that bit abou' the coat though. Aye'll try not ta let me gorgeous, flowing locks offend yew ovar'ly mooch. And did yew jus' call me ah 'mutt'? Ah mutt? Do Aye look that small ta yew?"
Ravenface felt her fur heat in embarrassment and she stared at her paws. The two stood awkwardly in the camp for a moment. Most cats were headed to bed, although the Dawn Patrol was moving around begrudgingly and the guard was changing at the tunnel.
"Who do you normally get to collect herbs?" the beast asked.
"Specklefoot," Ravenface answered with a sigh. "But whoever you feel most comfortable with can come. It doesn't matter."
"Specklefoot works."
This caught the shecat by surprise. "You do remember Specklefoot, right? Pale fur. Funny accent. Attention span of a gnat? That's the cat you want to help you on a supposed ambush?"
A bit of a smile curved on the edges of the shecat's mouth but she merely shrugged. "He has spots."
As if that was some sort of answer, but who was Raven to argue logic with a cat when she only stood up to its knees? Maybe there was some secret underground Spotted Cats Alliance. Spots it was.
She slipped into the Warrior Den and found her quarry. She knew he would be in here somewhere, either just settling in or just waking up for the Dawn Patrol. Starlingfur would understand if they were short one member, and if Shadowfrost was leading it and wanted to give them trouble she defied him to try. She had experienced too many set backs already and dawn would be on them in moments. She needed to be out in the fields not stuck her for untold hours.
"Get up. Herb gathering," she prompted quietly. The Warrior's Den was warm and dark. Nothing like her own cold, barren nest. Her paws felt ten times heavier with every second she spent, so she did not linger. The tiny, miserable urge to slip into a nest, preferably Bolt's, and escape into the safety of a warm, secure sleep that would not be interrupted by cries of agony was rising out of her with bubbling layers of misery and frustration as she denied it.
"I'll meet you outside... Now."
That was all the shecat said before slipping back outside to wait, her chest tight with longing. Just one night. Just one night where she didn't wake up to agony and death. -But all those cats in there, every last one of them, was depending on her. They needed her. They needed her to do it because no one else could. Ravenface bitterly longed for her apprentices from the Tribe. She had trained 4 of them, although Echo had shown the most promise. She had been the one to succeed her with the title of Healer. What the shecat wouldn't give for a second opinion. For someone to look at this disease with her. To give her a new perspective. To help her come up with a new solution. Or, maybe, to tell her she had done the right thing. Desperately Ravenface wanted this. Someone, anyone, to tell her that she had done the best anyone could do. That it wasn't her fault. That no one could have done any better. That all her sleepless nights and headaches and screams of frustration as she battled an invisible terror had meant something and not been in vain.
But if wishes were prey, no cat would starve. No one could judge her and offer her comfort save herself and until she found a cure she would never judge her work worth anything more than the dirt and dust that remained of the dead in seasons to come.
Specklefoot was moving. She hardly waited for greetings for pass, too jarred by stress and lack of sleep, too shaky on her paws to care about anything other than getting out there to collect her herbs and getting back to ram her head into the briar wall a hundred more times over trying to find a solution that never came.
"Let's go."
